Pleasure Before Business!!

You can almost smell the sense of anticipation!

The big news in Spain this week was that a butcher in Pontevedra name Marcelino is winning a million and a half euro in the Primitiva lottery, thereby doubling the gross regional income of Galicia in one stroke. As you can see in the video I have linked to, all the Galicians are celebrating in their usual way by getting drunk and standing around in the streets doing nothing.

Marcelino is a 48-year-old butcher in the Pontevedra supermarket who use the same numbers every week for the lottery, because it is difficult for him to think of new ones all the time. As you can imagine, he lives at home still with his mother and his sister, but now that he has won all this money, he says, he is going to give up his job altogether in order to take care of the two most important loves of his life, namely, his two oxen (see above), which are name Lucero and Platero, and who he says are like sons to him, escept of course they are sons who he makes pull his plough and who shit in his fields.

As you can see also in the picture, Marcelino already has allowed his oxen to move into his unpretentious home. By the look on the faces of Lucero and Platero, you can tell that they are thinking, "Where is the bloody television?" Now that Marcelino has all that money, he will have to bring the electricity, the running water, the refridgeration, the Internet porn all into his home in order to keep his sons used to the lifestyle that they have not yet become accustomed to but which they will espect as the sons of a millionaire butcher. Is only a matter of time before they are speeding around in a flash Seat soft-top and starting fights in the most espensive night-clubs in Vigo, of which there are none.

Nobody is, I think, envying Marcelino or his oxen their win. In fact, is very nice that he is spending the money on someone other than himself and his family, sharing around the success like in that old proverb: a problem shared is a joy forever. However, there was also another winner of the Primitiva, a rich industrialist who own a factory in Portugal, and nobody is making any such fuss about him, even though there is no doubt that giving the lottery money to such a rich man is without doubt a much better waste of the public's money. He will no doubt be using it to create jobs or to grease the oily palms of politicians in order to facilitate rezoning of land or overlooking of chemicals dumped into the local river, thereby contributing to the local economy, generating both employment and the need for investment in environmental projects, stimulating growth. However much the sentimental public likes stories such as Marcelino's of a poor butcher winning more money than he know what to do with, is precisely because he does not know what to do with it that we should be making sure that lottery winners have more sense and know what to do with it. We should be ensuring that the lottery winners are all rich industrialists and land owners who will use the money wisely.

Of course, this will not happen while people have the vote. Is really quite immoral.

Commiserations!!

"Power . . . to All Our Friends!!!"

I see that much of the biased liberal-communist mainstream English-language media have been running the ridiculous story about how British singer Cliff Richards (seen above) was robbed of the Eurovision Song Contest title by underhand scheming on the part of El Generalísimo Francisco Franco, who was supposedly running around to the television channels of other countries and say to them, "If you vote for the much better song 'La La La' by raven-haired Spanish beauty Massiel, I will buy your shitty comedy series about a farting Resistance member or those documentaries about Emmenthal, even though I do not promise to show them to my discerning idiotic Spanish television public." Of course, if such an outrageous assertion were true (and let us remind ourselves that it is made by a Spanish television documentary team and therefore has only limited claim to our credulity), most of Europe would be grateful to El Generalísimo for sparing them the prospect of an estensive and successful career by the rich man's Elvis. In my opinion, is a good thing altogether that Cliff Richards did not make any more records after that!

However, the real story that everyone is missing is the real conspiracy that took place that night. I have it on good authority from sources very high up in the Spanish Catholic hierarchy that Cliff Richards was making a pact with Satan himself. Yes! Cliff agreed to sell his soul in eschange for a top 3 placing and on the understanding that he would never grow old, like the man in that Oscar Wilde story "A Portrait of Earl Grey." He also agree as part of the package with Satan to promote Protestantism as the true Christianity in order to deliberately steal souls from Jesus and the One True Church, as well as also playing tennis whenever he could in order to promote homosexuality.

For many years, peoples was wondering to themselves, how come Cliff Richards is not getting old? Or they say to themselves, "Glory Be, Is that bastard still alive?" "Is he still singing that bloody song that lost the Eurovision Song Contest in a fair fight to the lovely Massiel?" And "Will this torture never end?" And all that time, the secret of his deal with Satan was safe. However, when the Vatican find out, they was able to confront Satan with his ploy, and he have to own up to it and renege on the deal, with the result, as you can see, that now Mr. Richards is not looking so smug and youthful at all on stage but is all wrinkly and gnarly and arboreal, as befits his age. One hundred and three.

On an entirely unrelated note, did anyone of you also see that the Scottish singer Chris de Burgh is being sent to perform in Libya? Si, is true! Apparently, he is performing in revenge for the Libyan involvement in the bombing of Pam An 90210 over Lockerbie on 9/11. After he has played there, he is continuing his tour by visiting Iran, Iraq and North Korea, accompanied by his backing band, the Axes of Evil. I espect that while he is there he is going to scare the Muslamics with his special superpowers and destroy their chimerical weapons with his laser show.

Cliff Richards would do well to watch and learn. THIS is how to grow old gracefully, Cliff!

The Tentacles of the Illuminati Reach Everywhere!

Endearing Ingenue, Country Pumpkin, or Simple Puppet of His Evil Taskmasters?

According to the newspapers here in Las Canarias, the people of London, England, have voted in for their new mayor a complete idiot who is very smart, the man named Boris Johnson, grandson of Samuel Boswell, who founded The Spectator magazine. This was not entirely unespected but his opponent, an incumbent, was once very popular with Cockerneys and had been at his post for what seem like more than a decade. However, because he eschew the limelight, he reduce his silhouette and everyone forget that he is mayor, while Johnson is appearing everywhere: in magazines, in newspapers, on television quiz comedy shows such as Question Time, and cetera. His bumbling, idiotic persona make him very popular with a people who want their politicians to be just like them: fallible incompetent moronics. This is precisely why George W. Bush is always winning in America. He does not need to rig the elections. The people elect a cretin because the people are cretins. What is the big surprise?

However, I am also hearing the rumours that Johnson is not in actuality such a tard but that this is just a mask which he put on in order to decept the voting masses. People is saying that Johnson was the editor of a magazine and was also a Rhodes Schollage at public school, which apparently mean that he is secretly brainy and only pretend to be dimwit in order for people to like him and feel superior to him. This is I think just the begrudgeful theorizing of an atheist communist left who hate losing and have to find a reason for it not in their own crapness but in the duplicitous tricking of the public, which thereby make them look ethical for running a decent, honest campaign while their opponent can only win by using underarm methods such as being likeable.

The real story here, however, which everyone miss, is that the only way Johnson could possibly win was because he have the backing of shady lucrative bigwigs who have an agenda that nobody know about. Is very clear to me that the fingers of the Illuminati Judaeo-Roman conspiracy are underneath Johnson, making sure that he was winning the election in order to discredit any authentically right-wing philosophy and politics. This election was really only business as usual as far as they are concerned. Once the people are being bored by the usual procedures and the same old faces, the Illuminati introduce a fresh face who the general public is thinking offers something new but who is really just another one of their stooges (there are three of them, I think). The elite who controls things like the economy, elections, television, schools, pornography, and protestantism ensure that the facade of democracy sustain the acquiescence of the idiot masses so that they can continue going about the business of Satan.

Let us be clear about this. Johnson is a genuine threat to all decent thinking fascists everywhere. The last thing we need right now is some kind of buffoonish clown who will make our beliefs look like the ridiculous idiotic absurdities they are. Will be a big problem for us to convince the imbecile people of Britain that we are telling the truth: When we say to them that Johnson is just a big tool, they laugh and say yes he is but then we like him anyway!

The sooner we abolish the vote, the better, I say. This would not have happened in Franco's day.

Is a Message from the Underground!

Artur Boruc Knows the Score: Is 3-2.

Did any of you see last week the Hard Firm match between Glasgow Celtics and Glasgow Rangers? Wasn't it rubbish? The football was shite and there was no atmosphere. However, there was an especial significance to the match which only those in the know will have appreciated, which was when the Celtic goalkeeper, Artur Boruc, who is a Holy Roman Catholic, remove his goalkeeping shirt and pass on a message to select members of the crowd concealed among the Celtics supporters, from the true pope, John Paul #2. This was an inspiring and uplifting moment for all of us in the movement.

The ordinary pig-ignorant Celtics fan was saying to himself, "Ah, isn't that just adorable. Boruc is still keeping alive the memory of the old pope. Is a terrible shame that his goal keeping is not as good as his memory keeping." What they are not aware of is that Boruc is not just a conduit for opposition goals but also a conduit for messages from the Underground, that pious, devoted and enlightened (a much-abused term!) elite of Holy Roman Catholics who have not been fooled by the pageantry and mock traditionalism that accompanied the apparent accession to the throne of Saint Peter by the Usurper Bendedict. The Friends of the Real Pope/Les Amis du Vrai Pape/Los Amigos del Papa Verdadero will endeavour with every last sinew in their bodies and every last bone in their ossuaries to get the message out to the world that the True Pope John Paul #2 is being held captive in the dungeons of Castel Gandolfo (irony of ironies! for this is where the popes of old kept their prisoners for recreational torture during their summer breaks), replaced by a fake pope who pretend to be conservative, traditional, fascist-background-type pope but who is really a communist stooge bringing the One True Church into disrepute with its laughable doctrines about abortion, fish paste, and shoes.

I am not at liberty, of course, to identify our members, but suffice to say that there are very many high-profile dignitaries and celebrities who play an important part in ensuring the Flame of Truth is kept burning and the Salmon of Knowledge is nicely cooked. Here, I must be not just the Salmon of Knowledge but also the Sole of Discretion (a good friend of the Plaice of Our Dreams). Is no surprise, however, if I tell you that, in addition to the bumbling Celtics kepper, there is also a member of U2 who belong to the Underground, although it is not the one you think it is, i.e. the one who thinks he is the real pope!

In addition, there is Kevin Rowlands, Paul Weller, Ricky Martin, Anthea Turner, Ian Hislop, Geri Halliwell, the Dalai Lama, Bryan Adams, Strom Thurmond, Ricky Gervais, the other one, Giorgio Armani, Eric Thwaite, Remington Steele, Cathy Bates, Roy Winstone, Jeremy Bates, Richard Dawkins, Jimmy Breville, Esther Freud, Cass R. Sunstein, Podge (but not Rodge), Rush Limbaugh, Giovanni Trappatoni, John O'Gormley, Anne Diamond, Cheryl Baker, Mark Cagney, Marshall Blonsky, Kurt Rove, Paul Wolfowitz, Derek Krugman, Muriel Spark, Colin Thirkettle, Missy Elliott, Scazz, J. R. Rowling, Takeshi "Beat" Kitano, and me.

And that is all.