Do Not Panic: Kill All Mexicans!!

Is no wonder the swine flu is spreading. His mask have holes in!!!

Hola everybody. I espect you have both been reading about the appalling pandemonic which is taking place in Mexico where they have crossed a pig with a virus and produced swine flu. If we are not careful now, it will cross over from Mexicans to humans and we will have a terrible kerfuffle on our hands just like is predicted in the Book of Revelation. The so-called scientists in charge are saying on the news that so far there are about 150 Mexicans that have died with the flu, which is I think half the population (all the rest of Mexicans live illegally in America) and also 1,600 of them are showing symptoms of the disease, which include the sneezing, the coughing, and rooting around in the dirt for potato peelings (although, as my good friend Carlos is say to me, "how can they tell?").

Once again we see humanity paying the price for 1: playing with Nature and 2: Not listening to God, and also 3: playing at being God. The swine flu can only develop when human and swine DNA are combined, which can only mean one of two things: Either someone is making the genetically modified pigs, or someone is having sex with pigs and reproducing, making small combined-human-baby-piglets. But also, wait, I have thought of perhaps a third possibility, which is that someone has make an organ transplant from a human being into a pig, maybe for practice or maybe to keep their favourite pet alive.

This would make sense, because, as you know, pig and human DNA are almost identical, apart from the bits for pubic hair and speaking Spanish. Pigs are actually genetically closer to us than gorillas, chimpnezees, bobobos, and pigmies, although they are also closer to pigmies than they are to us. In the past, it was common practice for surgeons to use organs from pigs for operations on humans if there was not the spare human organs around, for instance if the Chinese government was not executing anybody that week: Did you know, in fact, that the first heart transplant was carried out by Dr. Christian Barnyard in Switzerland using a pig's bladder instead of a human heart? No you did not.

It did not work.

But if this is possible to use pig organisms for humans, then it follow that the other way round is also possible, and that would esplain how the swine flu was invented. Perhap some well-known Mexican celebrity such as, erm, I am not knowing any, but say he have a pet Vietnamese pot-belly pig which have been diagnose as terminally ill with prostate cancer, and the celebrity say, "I care not one jot the espense, I will pay anything to save my pet," and some enterprising individual, probly from Southeast Asia, hear him and say, "No problem, he can have my prostate, I am not wanting it anyway, my wife's fingers are too short to reach it," and then he make the donation to the pig. In this way, the pig is now part human, and when he next catch flu off another pig, he convert it into a part pig-part human flu.

Or maybe the celebrity just had sex with his pig and got it that way.

Whichever way was the truth, and I do not think we can rule out any of these possibilities, I think that our responsibilities are clear now. We must erect a fence all the way along the border between Mexico and the civilized world so that no viruses can get through, and then we must starve the remaining few hundred Mexicans until the flu get fed up with the poor diet and the awful heat and decide to migrate back to pigs again, where the quality of life was much better.

In the Book of Revelation, St. John the Bizarre is predicted to have said that before a black man ever become the president of America, pigs would fly. And what do you know: Swine flu!!

You Cannot Teach Eggs Benedict to Suck Your Grandma!!

"Lighten up, baby. Don't be such a fascist!" "Huh! You're a lily-livered weak-kneed liberal and I want my real pope back."

Things have come to a pretty pass when the former leader of an industrialized country's socialist party is further to the right than the supposed head of the Catholic Church. Despite everything that was recently being done and said in the papers about the homosexuals and their objective disorders, such as HIV, narcissism, and disco dancing, Tony Blair has demonstrated by his past actions that he is a genuine principled man of the right, willing to subvert democratic processes in the interests of a jolly good war, happy to remove any and all socialist influences from his party's constitution and membership, and eager to prostitute himself and put the interests of multinational big businesses ahead of those of the great unwashed, also known as the electorate. For these many things we must salute him, all the more because he manage to do so while concealing himself underneath the thinnest carapace of "beliefs"; for years, nobody knew WHAT he stood for. Now, after all, we know that he is a Holy Roman Catholic who was fucking the Anglo-Saxon Protestant English up the arse all along! Is all very funny.

And yet, is not so funny. And not just because sodomy is an abomination in the eyes of the Lord, whether it is done with Protestants or not, but also because Blair has found himself stuck on a fork. A moral fork. With two prongs. A moral tuning fork. Or perhaps two knives tied together. Anyway, his problem is that, on the one hand, as a Roman Catholic for the last five minutes he now has to exhibit absolute and unwavering obedience to the head of his church, while on the other hand, he know full well that the head of his church is an illegitimate usurper who is only pretend to be advancing a far right agenda when in fact he is a sheep in wolf's clothing, a dissimulator (and a battery-operated one at that!) who, even if once upon a time he was a good fascist, is now just presenting a facade of a genuine right-wing agenda because he know that this is where the action is if he want to pick up any new members in Africa! Si! This is the truth behind the conspiracy. The Bednedict cabal is selling out our church to the darkies! They have realize that the Western hemsisphere is all secular or evangelical or agnostic or filled with homosexuals and communists, so now they are look further afield to recruit new members. A new struggle is taking place to colonize the Third World, and if it mean we have to pretend to want and welcome inferior races into Our Lord's church, then the Bednedict cabal is only too willing to open their arms and legs and mouths, saying all the right things that Africans want to hear about homosexuals and women and the like, yet all the time never mention what we think about immigrants. Is a big disgrace!

So what does the clever idiot Tony Blair try to do? Is very clear, I think. He is calling the pope's bluff by standing up for homosexuals. Everyone in Africa will read what he say, if they can read, that is, and they will say, "Hmm, I am very confused by all this. Up until now, I have always look upon Tony Blair as a decent upstanding extreme right-wing populist betrayer of the masses, the sort of man who really should be advising this pope. But if someone so right-wing is pro-gay, then where does that really put Bednedict on the political scale? He must be a child-love-fornicating bestialist with a sideline in snuff videos! If only the true pope, John Paul #2, was around, he would soon clear this matter up and our chances of joining the world's one true church would no longer be a matter for discussion because we'd never get in. Pass the Monster Munch."

I have heard in some quarters from people who should know better, things like, "Tony Blair should keep his trap shut," and "Obedience is the first virtue of a good Catholic" (which is true, but not to this pope) and "Give me back my baby oil, I haven't finished with it yet." All of these comments are out of place and show an incomplete understanding of the real complexities of the issues at stake here, which is why only a select few should be allowed their opinions, namely, the readers of this blog and Mr. Blair, who I think only reads it from time to time when I am discussing pop music and beach volleyball (I know he sends links of my posts to his friend the philanderer Bill Clinton, who look in from time to time). As you can see from this one example, the apparent story in the press is not all it is crack up to be. Is often something very different entirely, if you know how to read it properly. Once upon a time, only the clergy could read, and they would then tell everyone the correct story of what was going on. Is about time, I think, for us to return to those enlightened days, although I say "enlightened" with my lovable ironic Iberian accent. You all know what I mean.

Fame Is My Cruel Mistress and I Love Her

I am never being so popular before! Is like being John F. Kennedy. I only hope it doesn't go to my head like it did to his!!

I am all in a kerfuffle this week because of all the esciting attention I am being receiving from new peoples who have just found my blog, thanks to the wonders of the Internet. I espect you have seen some of the new commenters, many of them idiot Greeks who have learned now the English language, finally. This mean they will now have the chance to read the classics from their own history, such as 2001: A Space Odyssey, by Homer, The Thunderbirds, by Virgil Tracey, and The Iliad, by Troy Tempest. I am also receiving new attention thanks to my postings at the Irish Life Review, which is bringing my blog to the attention of all sorts of new readers, who are saying things like "What is this shit?" Si! Some people simply do not like exposing their mind to new ideas, even when they are old and venerable and highly respected ideas such as fascism!

I am make for you some esamples:

For my very erudite, informative, and edumacational posting on the Vietnam War recently, the tone of the debate was lowered by someone who call themself anonymous, who says:

"You are an asshole nazi scum. You are one of the biggest shame for the humanity."

Is not even a proper sentence! And what's more, it make the mockery of a very important and sensible debate we were having about U.S.-East Asian rapprochement, and "anonymous," if that IS his real name, come in and spoil it with name-calling. This is why the Internet should be allowed only the elites of society who know how to use it properly.

Anyway, I made the pleasantries, and I offer anonymous manly kisses, only then to receive this appalling comment from "ProudGeek":

"To what you said about Greeks:

I think you are an asshole. When we had civilization you were living in the caves fucnut.

I AM PROUD TO BE A GREEK AND HAPPY TO INFORM YOU WE ARE GONNA SPLIT THE HEAD OF EVERY FOREIGN CUNT LEECHING MY FAIR COUNTRY. FUCK OFF TO SPAIN BASTARDS. GREECE IS FOR GREEKS NOT FOR NIGGERS LIKE YOU.

The Greek ppl are real patriots."

What a big disgrace. And talk about Off-Topic!!

You see, some peoples get a bee in their bonnet about one thing you say, and then for them it colour everything else you say as if it invalidate all your thoughts. Is as though you were a fan of Hugh Grant, the fine English thespian and former British prime minister, and then you discover that he was getting a blowjob off a cheap Latino hooker in the back seat of a car. Would you then say, "Harumph. That's really spoiled Four Weddings and a Funeral for me now. And I'll never be able to watch Notting Hill again." No, you would not. You would say, "I will judge each individual film on its merit and THEN never watch them again." And you would be right.

What ProudGeek was complaining about, in fact, was this article which I write about the stupid crazy Greeks and their rioting in Athens. As you can see, there is nothing controversial in what I am write there. Is all commonsense and it hopefully make readers reflect and think, "Hmm. I had never think about this topic like that before. Manuel has let me see the whole world in a complete new set of lights." And after all, that is my pudenda. However, when this post is go up on the Irish Life Review site, it cause no end of kerfuffles. People are say things like:

"Can you spell something right in your native language?

Irish pigs bastards… AXE AND FIRE TO THE ENEMIES OF GREECE

Long live Greek proud nationalism

Fuck the barbarians"

Which I suppose is an advance on killing and enslaving the barbarians, which is what the Greeks used to do. Eventually, one of the nice Irish Life Review editors had to point out that the post I had written was meant in a spirit of constructive criticism and was in no way meant to imply that burning Athens to the ground was the best thing that could happen to the place. It was very decent of him to offer that interpretation to pacify the mentalists, I think.

And today now I read on my article about censorship, which concern the time another of my articles (on my favourite topic of lady lesbians) was censored by the Irish Life Review, this bizarre comment from someone who is name "Anti-fa":

Your URL from this post and your anti-Greek delirium has been sent to the police. I think you should know your rights before you try to insult other nationalities idiot. I hope immediate action will be taken against you very soon! That's it for now. Talk to u soon.

What is it with the idiot Greeks? Do they post their ravings anywhere they feel like it? Are their toilet walls and the streets of their towns and their dogs all having writing on them which say "You are an asshole nazi scum. I am telling the police"? Do they chant it at their football matches? Is it the first thing they say to their wives and children in the morning? It seem to me they have no control at all over where or when they say things. Is like a form of mad political Tourette's syndrome.

I am only point it out now because you can espect that it will turn up at your Web site soon. It seem to occur entirely at random! After all, is not like I have done anything out of the ordinary to incur their wrath.

Keep an eye out, and don't not take it personally. And if a Greek person sidle up to you in the urinal and say to you, "great big nazi cock," do not presume that it is meant as a compliment. They simply cannot help it. Just put your great big nazi cock away, wash your hands, and back away to the exit, all the time keeping an eye on the crazy Greek in case he try something. Becuase you never know what they might have in their purse.

Is a joke!

Do Not Panic: Kill All Orang-utans!!

Is for stuffing the bird of paradise, but you could be next!

As a devout and pious Christian, I am never cease to be amaze by the wonders of Our Lord's Creation and what he come up with next. I am think sometimes that when He make the universe all those years ago, long before you or I was being born, that Our Lord must have been on some pretty potent psychotropic drugs that had not yet been invented until he create them! For instance, just look at things like snails, tornadoes, oil paintings, CD cases, repelling pencils, cheese, lawn mowers and smoke. All of them must have been the product of an amazing derange mind with a superb imagination none of which any of us could dream of matching, even in our wildest dreams. Or in our imaginations. Can you imagine having such an imagination? No, you can't, which prove my point. In my case, for esample, all my dreams is of ladies' stockings. And nothing else. God's imagination must be at least thirteen times more powerful than my own humble wet imaginations.

And further proof of God's general all-round innovative brilliance come today with the news that so-called scientists have discovered a new population of Orang-utans in a remote part of Indonesia called now Borneo (which is an Indonesian word which mean humid. They have hundreds). You will note, of course, that the scientists was only discovering the Orang-utans. They did not invent them. God invents everything. Scientists only ever discover them: Gravity, Outer space, invisible carpets, and so on. Even the combustion engine was not invent, as everybody think (thanks to propaganda of so-called Enlightenment liberal freemasons) but was dug up in one piece in 1882 by three-year-old girl working down a coalmine in Alsace. She died the next day.

Anyway, these are no ordinary Orang-utan, as you can see above, who spend all their day sitting in trees with long lolloping arms and amuse themselves by pulling themselves off and aiming their spunks at monitor lizards on the floor below. Or throwing their poos at lady anthropologists. No! These are much advanced Orang-utans with a superior technology. They all wear clothes, for instance: a suit and tie during the week, and tracksuits or causal suede wear at the weekends. They also have the power of speech, through which they converse with one another about topical issues and also deliberate over technical matters such as the acquisition of food and shelter. The report says also that they have even manage to develop labour-saving machinery, such as cutlery (see picture above), nail files, vacuum cleaners, and a special catapult device that enables them to launch their shit at lady anthropologists 25 miles away. There is much here we can learn.

The problem that is face the Orang-utans most of all, however, is that much of their habitat is being destroyed by destruction. The rainforest is being replaced by palm oil plantations, from which is made the palm oil, used in such important and necessary products of modern life as candles, plastercasts of penises, soaps, olive oil, whales, and the cot. Indonesia and Malaysia are the biggest makers of palm oil in the world, after God, and because other countries nearby, such as Thailand and France, are very inconsiderate, Indonesia and Malaysia have to grow their plantations in their own country, which is drive the Orang-utans bananas!

The real danger for humanity, however, is that as the rainforest disappears, the Orang-utans will be forced to move into the towns and cities and find work there, bringing with them who knows what sorts of diseases and ideas. Is bad enough that they do not believe in holy matrimony. Just wait til they move in next door to you, with their nest in your attics and their old-school Islam, and their bloody muezzin calling them to prayer at all hours of the day and that Gamelan music that drive you round the bend! I tell you, this is just the thin end of the stick. Next thing you know they will be stealing our women and smoking our cigarettes and running our media, like Berlusconi in Italy. I don't think we should wait to let this happen. Write now to your European representative and insist that all steps are taken to ensure that this newly discovered population is wiped out before any damage can be done and it is all too late for normal thinking people like you and me.

You know it make sense!