Fight Like a Man!

Meet the Spartniks!

As regular readers of my blog are already know, my father was in the Spanish air force back in the time when it was the poor relation of the arm services. The navy and army and Spanish Foreign Legion was get most of the glory during the Spanish Civil War for Golf, and because there was no airplanes in Spain in those days, Franco borrowed Hitler's mighty Laftwuffe, whose notorious Condor Legion could bomb with pinpoint inaccuracy and was responsible for such atrocities as Coventry city centre and Picasso's Guernica. In my father's day, things were had have moved on a little, but even then the pilots was all having to share one plane between them, a decommished Douglas DC-3 which was bought from BOAC. One of the pilots and navigator would take off, while all the other 30 pilots would sit in the passenger seats, passing comments and making notes, and then they would take their turns flying the plane, practicing strafing, bombing, pretend machine gunning, loopy-loops, aerobantics, hide-and-seek, and cetera, and then also landing or crashing. Usually the pilot who was best at landing the plane did that bit.

In them days, having 32 men coop up in a confine space having larks and high-jinx and serving one another airline food and cockedtails and generally cavorting at altitude was a recipe for disaster, or worse, homosexuality. Remember, there was no trollie-dollies in the air force, so somebody had to be the lady. Fortunately, back then, there was also no homosexuality in Spain, because Franco had made them all convert. Those was the times, if you remember, although of course you are too young to remember, when Adolf Hitler make a promise that "every German lady will have a husband, no matter how ugly she is," which was ensure that he had all the women of Germany on his side, as well as all the ladies of other countries who did not want to marry German men; it was used to be said back then that "Hitler had his hands in the knickers of every woman in Germany." But in a nice way. Similarly, in Falangist Spain, there was no space for gayness. Unless it was a prison cell. This was not a case of homophobia, however, despite what you may imagine. Homophobia is fear of homosexuals, and we was not scared of them. If we had been scared of them, we would not have been able to beat them up or imprisom them.

A great deal have changed since those kingfisher days, of course, but it was still come as a great shock to me when I read this article in the paper the other day about the Spanish air force, who have just expel their first gay married man for being psychologically unfit for duty. What is shocking is not that he is a Spanish gay, since they are all over the place these days, but this bit:

En septiembre de 2006, Linero y Alberto Sánchez Fernández, también soldado destinado en la base de Morón de la Frontera (Sevilla), se casaron en el Ayuntamiento de Sevilla vestidos con el traje de gran gala del Ejército del Aire, en la que se definió como la primera boda entre militares homosexuales españoles.

La ceremonia fue oficiada por el alcalde de Sevilla, Alfredo Sánchez Monteseirín (PSOE), con asistencia de la concejal del PP Evelia Rincón y unos cien invitados entre familiares y amigos, además de varios militares compañeros de los novios.

What this is say is that two members of the military got married in their uniforms, and that this was not just acceptable but was preside over by the mayor of Seville (who was a socialist, so is no surprise there) but also with the assistance of a PP councilman and also not even in secret!, with friends and family there and also comrades from the military!! Is a big disgrace!

The once-proud tradition of shame and dissimulation and hiding one's carnal desires have disappear entirely from modern society, not just between men and women but also between men and men and women and women. And you can trust me, because I am have done the research. Thoroughly. In Franco's Spain, there was none of this nonsense. The hole society was militarized. Indeed, I can remember back in the 1970s, when all the communists and atheist socialists were causing trouble and stirring up discontent amongs the labour force, whenever there was a strike, El Generalísimo would put all of the striking workers on active military duty, so that, if they was refuse to work, they would be subjec to court martial for not obeying orders. This was a very clever and smart way of putting an end to any of that kind of thing, and the total militarization of society that way ensure also there was no homosexuality too. The laws which apply to the military apply to society as a hole.

Students of history will know, however, that this was only possible because we in Spain have fought the Spanish Civil War for Golf, a devout holy pious crusade of social hygience that enable us to fertilize the soil of Christian Spain with the blood of thousands of inverts, traitors, and infidels, all summarily esecuted so as not to corrupt our children with their foreing ideas. As consequences, we in Spain was having an almost utopian society after the war, and it was only due to the inflirtration of the country by its enemies in the 1960s and 1970s that everything was go downhill. In a golf cart.

Other societies was not so lucky. They was have to do things the hard way. Countries like America and Britain and France did not kill all their subversants, with the result that when war came and they was introduce conscuption for everyone, it meant that all the subversants were being give full military training and was teached how to use guns, bombs, grenades, and how to attack mansions and stately homes and castles with moats and so on. What a crazy idea!! Is bad enough teaching all your peasants to read. Imagine teaching them to read AND how to use weapons. Is an utter stupid!

After both world war ones and twos, Great Britain was close to revolution, in much part because of the suffering and brutality, but also because the stupid government had arm the workers. It was take a while to dawn on the slow demented inbred English aristocracy, but finally they realize that this is not the way to run an army. You need to have volunteers from the peasantry who are sutiably indoctrinated with patriotism, underneath an officer hierarchy which is entirely drawn from the ruling class. This is why now all the private schools in England teach their pupils officer training and why the aristocrats go hunting. It keeps them in tip-top military form and peek conditions, while the workers are all sat in front of the idiot-box and eating fish and chip and don't even know how to use a fork, let alone a knife or catapunt. And in America, the last time they was try conscuption it was for the Vietnam War, and that resulted in hippies. They won't do that again.

This logic of a militarize ruling class (when you cannot militarize society as a hole) was originally drawn from the Spartniks, who pinched the idea from Friedrich Nietzsche, famous for the saying, "Man is made for war, and woman is made for pleasure. All is else is madness." And he should know. The Spartniks engaged full-time in military training, and periodically they were allow thmselves to declare war on their own underclass, the Helots, who was the peasants and slaves and who provide the food for the society but who was not allow to possess weapons or to receive military instruction. What is also interesting about the Spartniks, however, and which is finally bring me to my point, is that the army was organize in such a way that every fighting man was given a partner, another fighting man, and they was often go in to battle tied together. What is more, the Spartnik society encourage the fighting men to love one another in a disgusting carnal way, so that they would be prepare to die for one another, but more important, kill for one another, on the battlefield.

Now although this is sound like something straight out of a gay porno fantasy (although I was drew the line at that particular research, so I am not sure), there is a logic here that I am think we could make use of to improve our decadent corrupt democratic Western atheist society one smidgen the better: Don't ban gays in the military. Make it compulsory! That way, we get all the homosexuals out of mainstream society and put in the full-time professional army. They will all be over the moon at the camaraderie and dressing up and marching and will be willing to kill and just die for one another, and at the same time this will avoid the need for having to train the peasantry in military skills. Of course, the officer class will still all be members of the ruling families, but wider society will be free of homosexuality's influence, we can post them all overseas to hot and sunny places a lot of the time, and this will do away also with that ridiculous kerfuffle they have in America over "Don't Ask, Don't Tell." You will be able to tell by the way they use their walk.

This is possibly too radical blue sky at night thinking for some people, and I know I will take flak, and possibly shrapnel, from some of my Falangist comrades for suggesting that the army's proud traditions of vigourous heterosexual brutality should be besmirch in this way, like a dark turd smeared across the Spanish flag, but I am trying to make the best of a bad fist. We have to work with what we are given, and although we fascists are not known for our compromise, this is a modern solution to a modern problem. It is not a final solution, obviously, and a final solution is probly out of the question once we have armed the gays, but it does mean the only people who will get killed in wartime will be non-breeders, so we can spare them anyway, and all the normal lovely civilian Spanish ladies will have every chance of finding a decent pious diminutive but hairy heterosexual Spanish husband such as myself, because we won't not be being blown up abroad for the greater glory of Halliburton.

Is a joke!

We Are Not Need No Education!

The Bullingdon Club: Producing Your Cultured Elite for the Last 200 Years

This week is a big one for all those layabout teenagers getting their A-level results and Leaving Cert certificates so that they can become layabout students at the espense of those of us who work or who live on their well-earn pensions, such as myself. Is a time of much angst, whatever that is, crying, punching walls, celebratory sex, consolatory sex, hangovers, legovers, pullovers, suicides, and avoiding the neighbours or phone calls from the smug relatives. As you will have seen in the paper today, the pass rate in Britain for the A levels this year was 99.999999 percent, which meant that only three people in the hole country failed, and they were all from the same family, in Southampton. The consequence of such a high pass rate, beside making the qualifications totally meaningless (consider, after all, that only 93 percent of the population has a birth certificate, which mean that being born is actually more impressive than having A-level molecular biology), is that competition for places in the country's universities are will be much intenserer than in previous years, which will mean that parents will be pulling all their strings to get their children in, whether they are pursestrings, apronstrings, or arsestrings.

In Ireland, there is a big kerfuffle now because of the danger of lots of students ending up on the dole, since there is no work for the ones who cannot get into university, and the goverment realize that providing places for them in university would (1) be estremely more espensive, and (2) could result in rioting like what happen in France and England in 1968, when lots of unemployable louts and thickoes were kept artificially off the unemployment register by building redbull universities and teaching them non-educational subjects like media studies, sociology, art, and cetera, which would be of no use to them when they eventually graduate and find a job in Abrakebabra or prostitution. Which is why they rioted.

Ireland traditionally was always use to have an escape hatch, because families were able to send their pointless mouths abroad to be a burden on somebody else instead, on the off-chance they might strike it lucky and send back lottery winnings or, if they emigrate to Australia, sunshine. This time round, however, there is nowhere for the family disgrace to be disappeared to, unless they are buried at the bottom of the garden and then everyone pretends that he have gone interrailing or off to India to find herself. Taking a year out is a great fall-back escuse, and in the meantime the family can build a hot tub in the back yard over the grave and then move to a new town where nobody know them.

Personally, though, I think that the concern about these results has getted out of all proportion. After all, who is really needing an education in this day and age, when we discover, like we did last week, that airplanes can now be landed by monkeys using just their thoughtwaves? Once upon a time a modicum of knowledge was required of the peasants so that they was able to do our accounts, read the weather forecast, fix my car, but with that came all the conconcomitant dangers posed by enabling inferior peoples to think for themselves and learn independently: teaching them to read would not have been so bad if the printing press was not being invented. They would have had nothing to read! Sadly, for some reason, education seems to come only with the harmful side-effect of autonomous thinking, which should always be stamped on like it was a crazed ant. Or boil water on it. Or crush its eggs and set fire to its nest. Fortunately, these days, the only people who are need knowledge are the Church, which is why we have confession, and robots who, eventually, when they are sophisticate enough, will be our willing slaves and will replace all the until now necessary workforce.

There is a solution to hand for all this bewailing and moaning, but the so-called right-wing governments in Britain and Ireland are too chickenshit coward to take the logical necessary steps, namely, to close down all the schools and universities. Think of all the money that would be saved (Schools like Eton and Clongowes would stay open, funded by the wealthy parents, but of course the purpose of such schools is not to provide an education: It is to provide a ruling class.) The governments could also then cut unemployment benefit to increase competition for the remaining jobs, so that only the best, most subservient and abject subjects would survive. All of the money saved from shutting the schools and getting rid of the dole could then be used to save the banks and reinstate the bonuses of the much-maligned and hard-done-by ruling elite who suffer more than anyone in harsh times because they are so much more sensitive and cultured than the brutish ignorant masses they support.

When punk band the Pink Floyd bring out their song "Another Prick in the Wall," which provide the title of this post, I was buy it straight away, listen to it, memorize the words, then eat it. I was a spy, remember, in those days. In a way, that song is still lodged within in me, both in my brain and in my lower instestine. Is time now, I believe, to bring it back up, to regurgitate values from the good old days so that society as a hole may benefit. Please join in with me. If you are not knowing the words, they go:

We are not need no education
What we need is thought control
Some dark Sarkozy in the palace
Teach us to leave our nads alone

Hey! Teach us! to leave our nads alone
Pray to god the ball hits another prick in the wall
Cover your crotch but don't touch your prick in the wall

Louder!!

Not a Worker in Sight: Paradise!!

Meet Your Brand-New Flight Crew!!

There have been esciting developments in the world of Spanish aviation which not many of you will have read about unless you subscribe to the Daily Mail, which is never cease to go on about bloody Spanish air traffic controllers. Visitors to Spain, tourists, foreingers, businessmen, decent people, those with private income, holidaymakers, and drug smugglers have all been unanimous, it is fair to say, over the years, in their frustration at the strikes, go-slows, go-quicks, and work-to-rules that these feckless layabout "workers" have seen fit to impose whenever it seem like the sun will come out. And if it is not the air traffic controllers, it is the pilots, and if it is not them, it is the baggage manhandlers. Only the nice pretty cabin staff seem to have a vocation, and that is only because ladies in Spain have always being brought up properly to do as they are told and to keep their mouths shut and not make a fuss. Otherwise nobody will want them.

These troubles and travails is all a thing of the past now, however, with the wonderful news that the island of La Gomera in Las Islas Canarias is pioneering a new system which will mean that the island's airport will no longer require air traffic controllers whatsoever. That's right! No more queueing for landing or taking off, no more sitting in hot tar on the runaway, no more smart-alex in the control tower barking orders to their betters just because pilots have a uniform and they don't. From now on, all planes will take off and arrive on time in La Gomera, which will mean that the several dozen tourists who visit the island each year will begin and end their holidays at the correct appointed hour, all the eggs and cattle at breakfast will be fresh, there will be soap and clean water available on arrival at their hotel, and the airport will be able to open and close at its designated official times (11.00 a.m. to 2.30 p.m, escept Mondays).

How are they all able to do this? I hear you ask. Weren't we all told that air traffic controllers are the vital life blood that keep the airports running smoothly and ensuring peoples get their connecting flights, and make sure planes don't crash into one another either by accident or for a laugh, because controllers are somber people who like nothing less than a good joke? Yes, you are right, we was all told that, but it turns out to have been propaganda from the Air Traffic Controllers Union People (ACT-UP). It now transpires that the airports can be run by teenagers using remote-controls guiding the planes into the airport. All that is needed is the ability to read a timetable and the use of both thumbs. Who was it said nothing good came out of 9/11?!

As you can imagine, not ALL of the youngsters on the island of La Gomera will be qualify for this job. Only the brightest and best amongst them, who you can see in the photo above. But just imagine this: A mere decade ago, even the majority of grownups on La Gomera pointed every time a plane went over head, and then hid under a cart, whereas today, thanks to juduicious use of the Nintendo Wii and Sony PlayStable, several of the island's children have been fully modernized, in a business-backed program that will see them given clothes and food and segregated off from the other children for fear of contamination. They will then work around a clock to ensure there are no more disasters like Pam Ann Flight 90210 or Heathrow Terminal 5.

This is, I think, only the start of a golden age of new efficiency in the workerless paradise of the new Spain. If you are think about it, there is no real need for the pilots on these planes either, because all they do is take off, say hello to the passengers, put the plane on autopilot, have a siesta, take the plane off autopilot, say goodbye to the passengers, then get lots of money. If the children at La Gomera take charge of take-off and landing, the autopilot can surely do the rest. And if you take a leaf out of Ryanair's books, you will not need the baggage manhandlers either, or even the cabin crew, escept to prevent/initiate punch-ups on board or give alcoholic drinks to frightened babies.

You know, an initiative like this could inspire businesses not just across Spain but right across Europe as a hole, in these dire economic times. If we are able to replace an entire workforce in the airports with a handful of idiot children and battery-controlled remotes, surely we can do the same in our factories, schools, and hospitals. I know David Cameron-Clegg for one is keen on the idea. He has already got rid of the ASBOs to free up the child labour force so they can leave the house at night time for the late shift down at the abattoir. Many jobs in the so-called "caring" professions, though not as worthwhile as jobs in, say, defence or marketing, can easily be carry out by children and the disabled. Having children in care or those on disability benefit team up and take care of one another automatically halves costs for the government.

Indeed, why stop at children? I was seeing on television a program about a paraplegic man who was waited on hand and foot by a trained spider monkey. They literally work for peanuts. And you must have read about the recent research in which scientists taught a monkey to move a robotic arm using just the power of its own thought? Consider the possibilities! In a few years times we could have monkeys landing planes just by thinking about it. And the rest of us could go on holiday all year in the very same planes, guided by monkeys!

Don't go to La Gomera, though. It is shit.